I hear various stances on this topic. Of course, what we call "dating" is supposed to be very differant than the world's view of dating, i.e. no physical contact before marriage, going to godly places, and probably chaperoned.

So here are a few of the views I have heard about:

1. Dating: The man asks a woman to go out on a date with him. She says yes. The date should be in a public place, godly place, and chaperoned. Sometimes this means church dates or group outings that the college provides for couples. Or the man asks the parents if he may date their daughter and permission is granted. Again, godly places and chaperoned.

2. Courtship 1: The man feels led by God to choose a particular woman to marry him. He seeks God's guidance before he asks her parents for permission. The parents seek God's guidance before giving him permission. If permission is granted, he then goes to the woman and explains that God has led it on his heart that she is to be his wife. She seeks God's guidance before agreeing to the marriage proposal. They get to know each other through chaperoned visits and planning the wedding. The engagement is short to lessen the potential for sin. Until marriage, women must think of men as only brothers in Christ and not be concerned about pleasing men. We should focus on God and not trying to attract a date.

3. Courtship 2: An elder of the church or a parent chooses the woman's husband. All involved seek God's guidance and the woman is told of the decision. She also seeks God's guidance before agreeing to the marriage. They get to know each other through chaperoned visits and planning the wedding. etc.


The main pitfall of dating is the huge possibility of broken hearts. And there is the temptation to sneak off alone and give into passion that should be saved for marriage. I lean more toward Courtship 1 myself. I've tried dating and have decided that it is not very godly and I end up focusing more on the guy than I focus on God.

Praise God! That's exciting! I've heard various ways of going about the whole "relationship/marriage" thing. My church believes in group, chaperoned dating. And my one friend is of a group who believes in the man first praying for a wife, asking her parents for prayer, before finally telling her about it, more prayer, short engagement (all supervised visits), and marriage. I don't think either approach is wrong.

It speaks a lot of you that you went and asked her father's permission to court her.

because of the craziness of some people....
and sleepy but no smiley face for that! LOL

There are no women on here to talk with though! =(